Child Self-Care and Mental Health Support by Age Group:
​When a Parent is Detained by ICE

When a parent is detained by ICE, children often face emotional challenges and uncertainties. Supporting their mental health and self-care is essential for their well-being. This guide offers practical steps for parents and caregivers to help children cope, understand their feelings, and build resilience during this difficult time.

Children Ages 5 and Younger

Purpose:
To provide comfort, reassurance, and stability.
Support Strategies:
  • Maintain Routine: Keep regular schedules for meals, sleep, and play to provide a sense of security.
  • Use Simple Explanations: Speak in gentle, age-appropriate language to explain that their parent is safe but temporarily away.
  • Offer Comfort: Hug, cuddle, or hold their hand to help them feel loved and safe.
  • Encourage Expression: Use drawing, play, or storytelling to help them express feelings they may not have words for.
  • Limit Exposure to Distressing News: Avoid media coverage; focus on positive activities and reassurance.
  • Provide a Secure Environment: Keep familiar belongings and routines to help them feel stable.
ACTIVITIES TO HELP CHILDREN 5 AND YOUNGER, EXPRESS AND COPE WITH EMOTIONS
SADNESS
ACTIVITIES
  • ​Feelings, Faces, Drawing​s
​DESCRIPTION
  • ​Draw simple faces with different expressions (happy, sad, scared) and ask the child to point to or color the face that shows how they feel.
SCARED
ACTIVITIES
  • Comfort Object or Blanket
DESCRIPTION
  • ​​Use a favorite stuffed animal or blanket when feeling scared to provide comfort and a sense of security. Role-play with the stuffed animal to talk about fears.
ANGRY
ACTIVITIES
  • Play-Dough or Clay

DESCRIPTION
  • ​Squeeze, mold, and shape play-dough to help release tension and express feelings through tactile activity. Talk about what made them angry while playing.

Children Ages 6-10

Purpose:
Help them understand the situation and express their feelings.
Support Strategies:
  • Open Communication: Encourage them to ask questions and express their emotions; answer honestly but simply.
  • Validate Feelings: Reassure them that it’s normal to feel sad, scared, or angry.
  • Maintain Routines: Keep consistent daily activities to promote stability.
  • Encourage Creative Expression: Use drawing, journaling, or talking to help process emotions.
  • Stay Connected: Facilitate regular calls or visits with their detained parent if possible.
  • Access Support: Seek help from school counselors or community organizations for additional emotional support.
  • Teach Coping Skills: Practice breathing exercises, mindfulness, or grounding techniques together.
ACTIVITIES TO HELP CHILDREN AGES 6-10, EXPRESS AND COPE WITH EMOTIONS
SADNESS
ACTIVITIES
  • Journal for emotions
​DESCRIPTION
  • Draw or write about a time they felt sad and what helped them feel better. Use colorful drawings or simple sentences.
SCARED
ACTIVITIES
  • Breathing bubble exercise

DESCRIPTION
  • ​Pretend to blow bubbles by taking deep breaths, imagining their fear as a bubble that slowly floats away. Practice breathing together.
ANGRY
ACTIVITIES
  • Anger release box
DESCRIPTION
  • Decorate a box and fill it with paper, drawings, or words describing what makes them angry. When upset, they can write or draw feelings and then safely "close" them in the box.

Children Ages 11-17

Purpose:
Support independence, emotional processing, and resilience.

​Support Strategies:
  • Honest but Age-Appropriate Conversations: Talk openly about the situation, acknowledging their feelings and fears.
  • Encourage Expression: Support journaling, art, or talking with trusted adults about their emotions.
  • Promote Routine and Normalcy: Maintain daily schedules, school routines, and hobbies to provide stability.
  • Facilitate Connection: Encourage regular communication with their detained parent via calls or video chats.
  • Access Professional Help: Connect them with mental health professionals experienced in trauma and family separation.
  • Empower Resilience: Reinforce their strengths, resilience, and hope for the future.
  • Limit Media Exposure: Discourage excessive news consumption related to immigration enforcement.
​ACTIVITIES TO HELP CHILDREN AGES 11-17, EXPRESS AND COPE WITH EMOTIONS
SADNESS
ACTIVITIES
  • Expressive Writing or Poetry
DESCRIPTION
  • ​Write a poem, letter, or journal entry about their feelings of sadness, focusing on what they miss or hope for.
SCARED
ACTIVITIES
  • Coping Toolbox Creation
DESCRIPTION
  • Make a "coping toolbox" with items or activities that help them feel safe (e.g., photos, calming music, favorite quotes). Use it whenever they feel scared.
ANGRY
ACTIVITIES
  • Physical Activity or Creative Outlet
DESCRIPTION
  • Encourage activities like running, dancing, or drawing to channel anger healthily. They can create art or music expressing their feelings.

Additional Tips

Supporting children’s mental health during their parent’s detention is vital. Providing a stable, supportive, and understanding environment helps children process their emotions and build resilience during this difficult time.
  • Always validate their feelings with statements like, “It’s okay to feel sad/scared/angry. I’m here with you.”
  • Engage in these activities together to provide support and model healthy expression.
  • Use age-appropriate language and tools to make activities accessible and comforting.
​IF YOU NEED HELP - GET SUPPORT OR COUNSELING ASSISTANCE

Disclaimer

This guide is intended to provide general information and support for parents and caregivers during challenging times. It is not a substitute for professional mental health advice or treatment. If you or your child is experiencing significant emotional distress, please seek assistance from qualified mental health professionals.
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